A Somatic Approach to Breaking Free from a Victim Mentality
How somatic therapy can help you step into empowerment in the new year
4 min read
Have you ever felt stuck in a repetitive loop of blame, powerlessness, or frustration? Maybe you’ve caught yourself thinking, ‘Why does this always happen to me?’ or ‘Why won’t anyone step up for me the way I step up for them?’
This mindset, known as “victim consciousness,” can feel deeply isolating—and familiar. For many of us, not only is it a mental state of being, but a well-worn survival strategy, shaped by difficult experiences and reinforced over time. While these patterns may have protected us in our past, staying in this cycle can leave us feeling disconnected from our own sense of inner agency and strength.
So, how do we begin to shift out of it?
“Victim Consciousness” is often explained using the The Karpman Drama Triangle. If you’re unfamiliar with it, the Karpman Drama Triangle is a psychological model that reveals three recurring roles we might find ourselves playing at any given time:
1. Victim: Feeling powerless or stuck, blaming circumstances or others.
2. Rescuer: Overextending yourself to help others, often at the expense of your own needs.
3. Persecutor: Criticizing or blaming others as a way to regain a sense of control.
“Oftentimes, as with a lot of our unconscious behaviors, it arises from trauma, learned helplessness, or some of the natural coping strategies we developed to survive difficult experiences.”
Sadly, all of these roles can feel deeply familiar and hard–if not downright impossible–to get out of. If you’re familiar with these states, it is unintentional when we identify with the erroneous belief that we are powerless, wronged, and unable to change our circumstances.
Oftentimes, as with a lot of our unconscious behaviors, it arises from trauma, learned helplessness, or some of the natural coping strategies we developed to survive difficult experiences. However, in staying in this mindset, there can be quite a cost as it can limit our personal access to agency, growth and even joy.
These roles often create repeating dynamics in relationships, leaving everyone feeling stuck. For example, in the workplace, you might find yourself overextending yourself as the “rescuer,” only to feel resentful later and shift into the “persecutor” role.
Breaking free from these patterns requires not mere awareness, but also a shift in how we embody and process these roles.
That’s where somatic therapy can come in.
“Each of these states are actually associated with a state of nervous system activation.”
If you’re considering somatic therapy in New York City for the ways you feel stuck in this cycle, specifically for self-sobotaging behaviors, like the ones that keep you in the three roles, look no further – especially as each of these are actually associated with a state of nervous system activation: fight, flight, fawn, or freeze. Victim is close to the freeze/fawn state. Rescuer is closer to flight/fight (e.g. think of our activism, helper parts). Persecutor is, of course, also fight.
“Somatic therapy helps us profoundly by focusing so much on the interconnectedness of our physical sensations and emotional experiences, leading to greater awareness and wholeness.” Stephanie Alirkan, an Advanced AEDP somatic practitioner at Downtown Somatic Therapy marvels.
Somatic therapy, a body-centered approach to healing, focuses on the mind-body connection to address deeply ingrained emotional patterns like victim consciousness. Unlike traditional talk therapy, somatic therapy helps you explore how these roles and patterns live in your body.
“Understanding victim consciousness isn’t about self-blame; it’s about self-awareness, so truly, recognizing these patterns is the first step toward reclaiming your power.”
For example, feeling like a “victim” might manifest as tension in your chest, a sense of collapse in your shoulders, or shallow breathing. These physical expressions reinforce the emotional state, creating a loop that keeps you stuck.
Our therapists at NYC’s Downtown Somatic Therapy can help with recognizing and releasing these calcified structures in mental states by identifying where these roles ( victimhood, blame, or over-responsibility) shows up in your body and learn techniques to release these sensations. Through this, you’ll be able to reclaim your agency using somatic tools like grounding, breathwork, or movement to step into feelings of strength and empowerment. Lastly, somatic therapy can also help you in rewiring responses shifting your reactive patterns to intentional responses that honor your boundaries and values.
If you feel familiarity in the Karpman Drama Triangle, you’re absolutely not alone as it's such a natural part of our experiences as humans. As you begin your therapy journey, using the triangle as a tool can create a powerful opportunity for growth via this new awareness of where to map your mental state to.
Understanding victim consciousness isn’t about self-blame; it’s about self-awareness, so truly, recognizing these patterns is the first step toward reclaiming your power.
Somatic therapy provides a compassionate, holistic way to process the emotions, beliefs, and physical sensations tied to these roles.
At Downtown Somatic Therapy in NYC, we specialize in helping clients navigate patterns like victim consciousness through body-centered practices. This transformative work allows you to move out of disempowered states and into a life where you feel grounded, capable, and free.
Are you ready to step off the drama triangle and into your power? Schedule a consultation with one of our therapists today!